The Sacred Cow

Socialism: If you have two cows, you give one to your neighbor.

Communism: If you have two cows, you give them to the government and the government then gives you some milk.

Fascism: If you have two cows, you keep the cows and give the milk to the government; then the government sells you some milk.

New Dealism: if you have two cows, you shoot one and milk the other; then you pour the milk down the drain.

Nazism: If you have two cows, the government shoots you and keeps the cows.

Nanny Stateism: If you have two cows, we’re going to show up at your house at dawn with a cease-and-desist letter and forbid you to do anything useful with their milk until you comply with General Laws Chapter 94, Sections 13 and 16 through 16K, Chapter 94A, and the regulations found in 330 CMR 27.00 et seq.

Capitalism: If you have two cows, you sell one and buy a bull.